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The author explains the annoyance of sharing a last name with a national holiday

Tyler Valentine

Everyone has their day throughout the year: a birthday. I have been blessed with the last name Valentine, which practically makes Valentine’s Day my holiday, and a second birthday.

The day, for me, is filled with way more joy than any average person’s Valentine’s Day purely because of my name. My family celebration of Valentine’s Day is more on par with that of Christmas because I am the one that invented the holiday that has been around for thousands of years. Yeet.

February 14, or Valentine’s Day, is a day for you to show your loved one how much you love them and what they mean to you. For others, without a significant other, their time that would typically be spent on a girl is spent on showcasing how dry your sense of humor is by cracking the same age-old jokes about my last name.

Jokes include asking me to be their Valentine, or if my family had something to do with the creation of Valentine’s Day have become regular. I understand if you’re my friend, or even if we are acquaintances and you can’t help but say something, but if I haven’t talked to you in over a year, please do not put me in an awkward situation by asking me to be my Valentine. I guarantee you haven’t had a more awkward encounter than having a random person ask you to be their Valentine, all I can do is awkwardly look at them and force a laugh. I know what you’re thinking “People are just being sarcastic; they don’t actually think that.”

When the best thing about it is that there are some people that actually think it is possible that I came up with Valentine’s Day. There are numerous people with the last name Christmas, or Easter, and that doesn’t mean they are related to the historical features.

Since second grade, I have heard the same jokes every single year. The attention was much appreciated back when I was eight, but it is beginning to grow old. Sure, it might have been a clever comment back then, but now it just makes the day annoying. I know it may be hard, but it would be much appreciated if you can keep the comments to yourself this year.

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By Squall